


baby, touch me

by fullsunshine (polyjaemin)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Cuddling, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Mild Language, Miscommunication, bed sharing, boys being dumb, fluff fluff fluff fluff, severe overuse of emphasis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-08-02 11:42:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16304546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polyjaemin/pseuds/fullsunshine
Summary: “God, Jungwoo, if you cling to Jaehyun any closer I’ll start to worry that you’re cutting off his circulation.”Jaehyun is Jungwoo's favorite person to cling to. So when Jungwoo suddenly stops being touchy with him one day, Jaehyun feels the loss.





	baby, touch me

**Author's Note:**

> [shrieks]
> 
> s/o to my dear miss blue for birthing and nurturing this fic idea with me every step of the way~~ also thank u to my NCT Writers Guild ally+chwisti for editing feedback, and to my tayler for the squealing and support always always ♡♡♡ i have the best fwiends
> 
> the world needs more sof jaewoo. i am Being the change i want to see in the world

“ _God_ , Jungwoo, if you cling to Jaehyun any closer I’ll start to worry that you’re cutting off his circulation.”

Hair tickles Jaehyun’s face as Jungwoo lifts his head from where he’s curled up in Jaehyun’s lap on the couch, knees and arms hooked around Jaehyun’s body and head tucked under his jaw. They both look at Yuta, who had just come into the room to find them essentially _canoodling_ out in plain sight (Yuta’s choice of wording).

“Are you even alive under there, Jaehyun? Can you breathe?” Sicheng laughs, as Yuta crosses the room to squeeze down next to him. Johnny trails behind and plops onto the other end of the couch from Jaehyun and Jungwoo.

“Blink once for ‘no’ and twice for ‘yes,’” Yuta leans out to study Jaehyun’s face with mock concern. Jaehyun rolls his eyes and looks to scan Jungwoo’s face, inches from his, finding a faint warm blush and his mouth opened in a tiny _O_. Yuta breaks out into more laughter and leans back.

Jaehyun opens his mouth, ready to defend their position and his comfort level (very high and perfectly breathable, thank you), when Johnny interrupts, “Dude, Jungwoo is literally always like this.” 

“Jaehyun’s not, though!” Yuta says with a laugh. “Man, I wish someone was as obsessed with me as Jungwoo is with Jaehyun. Poor Jae is his number one victim.”

At this, Jaehyun just smiles and blushes, embarrassed. It’s not a secret that Jungwoo does not make any effort to hide his affections. Touching, cuddling, hugging, hearing _I love you_ \- it’s all pretty par for the course when you live and work with Jungwoo. And maybe Jaehyun has noticed that Jungwoo is _especially_ affectionate with him, that he clings a little bit more intimately to Jaehyun. (Or maybe he just hopes he does. A little.) 

“Oh yeah, he’s constantly suffering,” Johnny answers, tone heavy with sarcasm.

“We _are_ still literally _right here_ , you know,” Jaehyun tries, but the rest of the room has already moved on, talking over each other excitedly about the movie, Johnny leaning over to flick the light off.

Jaehyun just shakes his head at his friends but looks over at Jungwoo to see the warmth from before slowly falling from his face, replaced with a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Jungwoo stars to disentangle himself from Jaehyun, moving his legs off his lap and his arms from around his waist. He stays pressed to Jaehyun’s side, but sits up taller and not wrapped around him like before. 

Jaehyun misses the warmth instantly, and looks to Jungwoo’s face in confusion. But Jungwoo refuses to meet Jaehyun’s eyes, looking instead steadily ahead at the TV, even though the only thing playing yet is the menu on loop.

He reluctantly pulls his attention forward again when Yuta, oblivious to the change on the couch, presses play, and he spends the entire movie trying not to think about the boy pressed beside him.

~~~

Jaehyun goes to bed hoping that it was just a weird mood that would pass with the night, and greets Jungwoo the next morning with a sleepy smile and coffee. He waits for a hand on his shoulder, or a hug, or for Jungwoo to stand beside him at the counter and snake his arm behind Jaehyun, thumb absentmindedly brushing Jaehyun’s hip, like he always does, like Jaehyun always loves him doing.

Instead, Jungwoo returns the smile, takes the coffee, and sits at the far end of the table away from Jaehyun, and Jaehyun’s heart starts to sink.

Jaehyun feels the hope continue to slowly drain from him over the next few days as Jungwoo shies away from him at every turn. The hope is all but evaporated when days turn into weeks, and Jungwoo barely touches Jaehyun beyond slight brushes of contact at _all_. It’s like a sudden void by Jaehyun’s side, where there used to be warmth, an arm around his shoulder, his waist, a hand on his arm, hair brushing his face, a thigh pressing against his own.

Despite his overwhelming busyness, Jaehyun spends a frankly embarrassing amount of time trying to reason out _why._ It’s not like they fought, or even stopped speaking at all. Jungwoo still sits by him at meals, still laughs at his jokes, still texts him whatever ridiculous thoughts come to his mind at all hours of the day. He still sends hearts with almost _everything_. Their eyes still meet across the room when they think of something at the same time, looking at each other with knowing smiles and silent communication. Jungwoo still looks at him with that soft bright smile that reminds him of a sunrise and Jaehyun still feels a tug on his chest every time.

Jungwoo just doesn’t _touch_ , and it leaves a cold space around Jaehyun.

Jaehyun replays Yuta and Sicheng’s jokes from their movie night in his mind. Surely Jungwoo wouldn’t let stupid comments affect him like that, right? He gets teased for cuddling everyone all the time, there’s nothing different about this time. Jungwoo has always been confident in who he is and clear about what he wants. Was he so offended by the implication that Jaehyun was special?

 _He must’ve decided he just didn’t want to be close to me anymore, that he doesn’t want to give me the wrong idea,_ Jaehyun finally concludes. _That’s okay. If that’s what he wants._

~~~

Jungwoo is sitting in Yukhei’s lap. 

Not that Jungwoo sitting in Yukhei’s lap is that odd of an occurrence, but _usually_ Jungwoo sits with [on] _Jaehyun_ on movie nights. Jaehyun had even kicked Johnny to the other side of the couch so the the middle would be free for Jungwoo, hoping that finally settling down for a movie might allow for a bit of an exception from the past few weeks of distance.

So when Jungwoo walks straight past the empty couch like Jaehyun isn’t even there to squeeze onto the chair where Yukhei is already sitting and cozies in for a snuggle, Jaehyun feels his heart sink. 

Not an exception, then. 

Jaehyun watches from his side of the couch with narrowed eyes and tries to convince himself that it’s not bothering him. He wraps a blanket around himself, feeling colder than usual.

~~~

“Dude. You are pathetic.” 

Jaehyun closes the fridge and looks toward where the comment came from. Johnny stands in the doorway, leaning on the frame, arms crossed across his chest.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jaehyun replies, turning away to pour some milk into his tea. 

“You literally just glared at Yukhei for a full two hours,” Johnny says. “You were even _pouting_. You only pout when you’re trying not to be obvious, even though it just makes you even more obvious.”

Jaehyun makes a face and starts to protest. “I-”

“Bro. Don’t even try to deny,” Johnny interrupts. “Seriously though, I know this is about Jungwoo. Will you tell me what happened?”

“Nothing happened, Johnny, it’s fine,” Jaehyun replies quickly but keeps his tone light, busying himself with putting the milk back into the fridge and refusing to meet Johnny’s eyes.

“Bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit! Everything’s fine.” Jaehyun makes to try to leave the kitchen, but Johnny stands firm. All he gives in response is a flat expression with a raised eyebrow. Unconvinced. 

Jaehyun sighs. 

“He’s just been… a little distant lately, I guess. I don’t know! Why don’t you ask him? Can I go?”

“Because I’m asking you, Jaehyun. And clearly it’s bothering you; you’ve been moping for weeks. Oh, don’t worry, you’re not _that_ obvious, I just know you,” Johnny says pointedly. He shifts his weight and relaxes, but stays solid in the doorway. He continues in a softer tone, “He’s been distant? Did you fight or something?”

Jaehyun gives up and sits down at the table, setting down his mug of tea and crossing his arms, cursing himself for not thinking to expect this from Johnny. “No, we didn’t fight. He just stopped being… clingy. You know how Jungwoo is, touchy as hell? Except, suddenly, not with me. But he’s acting totally normal otherwise. It’s confusing as hell.”

“And he never said why?” Johnny asks, moving to sit across from Jaehyun. 

“Nope. Nothing.”

“And... instead of talking to him about it... you decided to mope and pout for weeks and look like you want to murder Yukhei with your eyes every time Jungwoo decides to get snuggly with him instead of you?”

“I do not want to murder Yukhei!!”

“But you _are_ jealous,” Johnny quips back quickly.

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

“Am not!”

“Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun releases a large defeated sigh and throws his head down into his arms.

“You miss him,” Johnny concludes, and Jaehyun nods slowly into his arms. “You do realize this isn’t a one-way thing, right? You may not know this, but you also have, like, arms? And a body? You don’t have to wait for Jungwoo to initiate contact.”

Jaehyun sighs for what feels like the hundredth time and picks his head back up to give Johnny a weary look. “It’s not just that, Johnny… It’s… I don’t know… I thought that I… I _hoped_ that I….”

“Was special?” Johnny finishes for him, and Jaehyun’s head hangs. “Dude. Jaehyun. You are. Jungwoo is like, in _love_ with you. Possibly even more in love than you are with him.” Jaehyun’s eyes fly up and he opens his mouth to protest again, only to be interrupted by Johnny again, “I swear you guys look at each other like you hung the damn stars. It’s a little gross, honestly.”

“Then why is he avoiding me like this?” Jaehyun whines, not even bothering to defend himself anymore, but he feels warmth in his ears and knows they’re betraying him. Damn those ears. “Ever since Yuta joked that he was _obsessed_ with me… He’s - he’s probably afraid he’s leading me on and wanted to stop giving me the wrong impression or something. He probably just doesn’t want to. Why else would he-”

“‘Probably, probably,’” Johnny imitates. “Damn, it’s really too bad he’s not a living, breathing, speaking adult that you could ask.”

“Fuck off, Johnny,” Jaehyun rolls his eyes.

“Listen,” Johnny puts his hands on Jaehyun’s elbows and leans in to demand his attention. “Talk. To. Him. Or at least just go cuddle with him yourself if you won’t fucking _talk_ about it. Maybe he just needs to know that you want him too. I swear I’ll force you to cuddle with _me_ if I have to see you sigh dramatically or murder poor innocent Yukhei with your eyes again.”

“I don’t want to murder Yukhei,” Jaehyun repeats defeatedly.

“Sure, Jaehyun.” Johnny pats Jaehyun’s elbows once before letting go and standing to leave. “Just… do _something_ about this, okay? I hate to see you so sad,” he finishes with a sigh before walking out of the kitchen. 

Jaehyun sits at the table, cold hands wrapped around his mug of tea, and thinks for a long time.

~~~

It’s another week before Jaehyun gathers the courage to Do Something About It. Another week full of brushing-but-not-quite-touching touches from Jungwoo, eye rolls and “nudges in the right direction” from Johnny, and that ever-present sinking feeling in Jaehyun’s heart. 

He _did_ have a whole speech ready, all about _friendship_ and _communication_ and _I respect your decision_ and _it’s okay if you’re not in love with me but I kind of maybe am and I miss you_. Okay, maybe The Speech would leave that last part unspoken.

All of it goes out the window, though, when Johnny suggests another movie night, whining that they have to watch the newest Avengers movie, and everyone piles into the living room together. Jaehyun seats himself on the couch and, rather than settling in for a night of glaring across the room, yanks Jungwoo’s arm as he passes, pulling him down next to him before he can sit anywhere else. 

Okay, Plan C it is.

Jungwoo looks at Jaehyun with surprise, but doesn’t try to move or escape Jaehyun’s grip.

“Sit with me tonight?” Jaehyun breathes, hopeful, loud enough for Jungwoo to hear, but quiet enough that it hangs in the air just between them.

The slow, shy smile and nod Jungwoo gives in response makes Jaehyun’s heart beat a little faster.

Jaehyun smiles back and they settle in together, arms linked and sides pressed to each other, Jaehyun’s hand resting on Jungwoo’s thigh, and Jaehyun finally starts to feel warm again.

~~~

Halfway through the movie, Jungwoo’s head has come to rest on Jaehyun’s shoulder. Jaehyun notices that he’s started to doze off, trying to fight it and jerking back awake periodically, shaking his head and blinking furiously.

Jaehyun finally pushes Jungwoo off of him and forward on the couch. He sees the questioning look from Jungwoo in the dim light from the screen and answers by bringing his legs up onto the couch and squeezing them behind Jungwoo, laying down on his side, pressed against the back of the couch. He grabs Jungwoo’s arm and pulls him down with him gently, pressing him into his chest and tucking him under his chin, resting Jungwoo’s head on his arm. They settle in, legs tangled comfortably, flushed together head to toe, and turn their attention back to the TV. 

Despite the mayhem and destruction playing out in the movie in front of them, Jaehyun can’t keep the smile off his face.

~~~

Jaehyun awakes overly warm, surrounded by darkness and quiet. He opens his eyes to see Jungwoo gently shaking him, twisted toward him as much as he can be in the tiny space in the couch. Jaehyun sleepily registers a blanket over them that hadn’t been there before. The only light in the room comes from a nearly-closed door, hallway light dully filtering in. 

“Hyung… Hyung, we should go to bed,” Jungwoo whispers sleepily. 

“Mmmmnnnhhh,” Jaehyun manages to groan out and closes his eyes again. “Comfy.”

“Hyuuuung, you know your back will kill you tomorrow if you sleep on the couch.” Jungwoo pokes his cheek. “Come on, get up.”

Jaehyun’s sleep-addled brain considers the possibility of moving from this spot, right here, surrounded by warmth and Jungwoo in his arms, and can’t imagine that anything Jungwoo can say will be convincing enough to get him to leave. All of this just comes out, though, as:

“Mmmm. Warm.”

“Your bed can be warm, too.”

“Not without you.”

Jaehyun takes a moment to realize he said this out loud, and not only _said_ it but _whined_ it. His eyes shoot open to meet Jungwoo’s, and he’s suddenly very grateful for the darkness shrouding the embarrassment that is no doubt painted all over his face. 

What he can vaguely see of Jungwoo’s face is frozen in slight surprise, and Jaehyun opens his mouth, though still unsure what to say or how to backtrack. Before he can say anything that will incriminate him even more, though, Jungwoo’s face softens into a smile. 

“Well, let’s go, then,” and he sits up. 

Jaehyun stays frozen on the couch, wondering if he misheard or misunderstood the implication. Jungwoo yanks the blanket off of them both and throws it to the other side of the couch. 

“Come _on_ , hyung,” Jungwoo pulls on Jaehyun’s arm. “Your room is closer than mine anyway.”

 _Oh_. Not misheard, then. Okay, maybe there _was_ something convincing enough to get him to move.

Jaehyun finally sits up and stretches his arms above his head, Jungwoo standing up beside the couch and doing the same. Jaehyun yawns deeply and when he opens his eyes an open hand is extend in front of him. Jungwoo helps him up and then keeps their hands linked together, leading them into the hall toward Jaehyun’s room silently. Both of them squint against the harsh hallway light and quickly dash into Jaehyun’s room, where Jungwoo finally lets go of Jaehyun’s hand to go to flick on the lamp beside Jaehyun’s bed. The room is flooded with a duller, warmer light that’s considerably easier on their eyes. 

Jaehyun closes his bedroom door behind him and looks over to Donghyuck’s side of the room and is relieved to see his bed empty. Not that Donghyuck would ask too many questions about Jungwoo staying the night, but Jaehyun’s embarrassed enough as it is, and feels his face heat up when he realizes he’s alone with Jungwoo for the night.

Jungwoo sits on Jaehyun’s bed and looks over to Donghyuck’s bed as well, and back to Jaehyun.

“Probably with Mark,” Jaehyun informs him with a smile. Jungwoo breathes a quiet _ah_ and nods in understanding, and turns to crawl under the blankets, leaving them open for Jaehyun to join him. Jaehyun ignores the fluttering in his heart at the sight and crosses the room.

Jaehyun suddenly realizes that he’s finally awake enough to feel many degrees of self conscious and embarrassed that he basically _invited_ Jungwoo to his _bed_. Or Jungwoo invited him to his own bed? Either way, _Jungwoo is in his bed_ , and Jaehyun’s head is feeling more and more like radio static as he crawls in beside Jungwoo and settles down onto his back.

The moment he looks over to Jungwoo, though, his mind goes entirely blank. All the tension bleeds from his body with a single exhale, because Jungwoo is looking back at him from inches away with his biggest eyes and that soft sunrise smile, like dawn is rising right there in Jaehyun’s bedroom. Jungwoo is lying on his side and immediately snuggles up to Jaehyun, placing an arm across his stomach. Jaehyun’s entire body relaxes, filled to the brim with the warmth that he’s been missing.

A weighty pause stretches out between them, and Jaehyun wonders if he should just turn the light off and go to sleep, but finally speaks before he talks himself out of it. 

“I’ve missed you.”

Jaehyun watches Jungwoo’s eyelids flutter minutely, face falling into something more serious, and the words linger between them in the quiet for another long moment before he responds.

“I didn’t know that you wanted… this,” Jungwoo says quietly, finally breaking their eye contact to glance away on the last word.

Jaehyun barely knows how to respond. _Of course I want this. Of course I want you. How do I tell you how much I want you? How much all of “this” means to me?_ All of his feelings catch in his throat and all he can stutter out is a quiet, “I… I do.”

“Oh,” and Jungwoo’s lips are turned up in a tiny smile, and Jaehyun’s heart threatens to do somersaults. 

“Always. I always want this,” he continues, voice barely audible, even in the silence. He brings his hand up to tangle his fingers with Jungwoo’s that rest on his stomach. He feels his ears and cheeks burning, but the look in Jungwoo’s eyes encourages him to continue. “I… I hope you… want this, too?”

Jungwoo’s eyes widen, “Of course I want this, hyung. I thought you didn’t…” 

“But,” Jaehyun’s voice feels so loud piercing the quiet that blankets the room. “I thought you didn’t - You - But,” he stutters out in confusion, “What about the last few weeks? Why have you been avoiding touching me?”

Jungwoo pauses and looks away. “I wanted to, I just… It was just that.... That night, when Yuta said-”

“Dammit, Yuta.”

“-that I was obsessed with you, I-”

“As if I’d have a problem with that,” Jaehyun mutters as Jungwoo finishes,

“I was afraid I was too obvious.” 

They stare at each other for a moment. Then:

“You wouldn’t?” Jungwoo asks at the same time Jaehyun asks,

“Obvious?”

They smile at each other briefly and pause, and Jungwoo takes the opportunity to answer first.

“Yeah, obvious. About, you know… you.”

Jaehyun takes one deep breath and asks, quietly, tentatively: “What… about me?”

“Isn’t it _obvious_?” Jungwoo answers, flashing a momentarily cheeky smile to mask a voice heavy with emotion. But it falls quickly as he sighs and his eyebrows furrow, and he continues, “I know I can be too much, hyung. I know I can be clingy, and intense, and I was just so afraid that I really was coming on way too strong, or obsessed, or that you were just putting up with me because-”

“Jungwoo,” Jaehyun interrupts before Jungwoo can continue. “You’re not too much, and I don’t just ‘put up’ with you. You know I care about you more than that. And I definitely don’t have a problem with this, you know? With you, with all this. Whatever… ‘this’ is.” He softly squeezes Jungwoo’s hand under his on his stomach, voice barely a whisper now, “I _like_ this. I… I like _you_. All of you.”

Jungwoo just looks back at him with eyes wide, staring with an intensity that makes Jaehyun feel _seen_ and _exposed_ and it’s all sorts of exhilarating and terrifying. He swallows it down to continue,

“I’m sorry if I never made that clear, Jungwoo.” 

He brings his other hand up from between them, folding his arm up to brush the backs of his knuckles tenderly along Jungwoo’s jaw, eyes moving to rake across his whole face, his eyebrows, the hair falling messily across his forehead, the long curve of his nose. His lips, full and pink and perfect.

Jaehyun has barely looked back up before Jungwoo is surging forward to kiss him. It’s confident, but it’s so soft, and so warm, and so perfectly _Jungwoo_ that Jaehyun would laugh if his heart and mind weren’t simultaneously short circuiting. 

Jungwoo pauses momentarily as soon as their lips meet, as if asking permission to continue, and Jaehyun doesn’t hesitate to press back in surely, eyes falling closed as he kisses Jungwoo back. He turns his head slightly to slot their lips together more deeply, and they move against each other slowly, the weight of their words and feelings heavy on their lips. Jaehyun rolls up onto his side to press up closer flush against Jungwoo, darting his tongue out to lick at Jungwoo’s lips, which fall open for him easily. 

Jaehyun releases Jungwoo’s hand on his stomach and moves his own up, brushing along the skin of Jungwoo’s arm gently as they kiss, ghosting over his shoulder and finally ending up curled around Jungwoo’s neck. It leaves Jungwoo’s hand free to press an open palm against Jaehyun’s stomach and waist, and Jaehyun feels Jungwoo grabbing at his side as he breathes hot into his mouth.

Jaehyun’s fingers smooth over soft hair and press into warm skin, and finally move up to cup Jungwoo’s cheek as they break apart, breaths deep and lips shining. The moment their eyes meet, Jungwoo’s face breaks into his sunrise smile, and Jaehyun can’t help but mirror it with his best imitation of his own. He moves his thumb back and forth, caressing Jungwoo’s cheek.

“I love your smile,” slips out of Jaehyun’s mouth. “It’s - it’s like a sunrise,” he continues quietly before he can convince himself to be embarrassed about the fact that he’s clearly thought a lot about it. “Bright and quiet and warm… Just, beautiful. Lighting everything up, you know,” he trails off, glancing away.

Somehow Jungwoo’s smile gets even brighter, though, eyes squeezed into crescents, and Jaehyun decides he’ll dredge up every cliché simile in his brain for Jungwoo to keep looking at him like that.

“Hey, Jaehyun hyung,” Jungwoo whispers through his smile like he’s telling a secret. “I like you too. Since I guess it wasn’t actually as obvious as I thought it was.”

“We’re both dumb, aren’t we,” Jaehyun laughs. “I guess we could actually talk about it next time one of us assumes we know what the other is thinking, yeah? Don’t tell Johnny I said that, though.”

“I’m sorry I stopped touching you out of the blue,” Jungwoo says after a moment, seriously. “I really thought you’d be _relieved_ or something. I should’ve just talked to you.”

“I really did miss you,“ Jaehyun admits sadly. “But I understand. We both should’ve talked sooner than we did. And I’m glad we have, now.”

“Also, fuck Yuta,” he adds. “I’m gonna kick his ass.”

Jungwoo laughs. “Ah, he wasn’t exactly wrong, though, was he,” he reasons.

“Are you admitting you’re obsessed with me, then?” Jaehyun teases. 

“Maaaaybe,” Jungwoo draws out, and scrunches up his face, bringing it closer so their noses touch in an eskimo kiss. Jaehyun presses forward and catches his lips in another full kiss, and it’s slow, and sweet, and it lingers.

They pull apart and a fierce yawn rips through Jungwoo, signalling that they should probably settle down to go back to sleep, and Jaehyun reaches behind him and flicks off his bedside lamp. He turns back to Jungwoo, who curls up into him, throwing a leg over Jaehyun’s and wrapping an arm across his chest, resting his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder. 

Jungwoo is heavy on top of him, and Jaehyun knows he’ll probably wake up with dead limbs and tingly extremities, but he’ll wake up warm, and he can’t think of anything he’d love more.

**Author's Note:**

> yes plan C stands for Cuddle
> 
> yes if you say "sure, jaehyun" fast enough it sounds like "sure, jan"
> 
> yes i know there are probably a million fics called baby touch me. listen. it fits ok
> 
> no i cannot believe i wrote something over 4k???????????????
> 
> [pls come talk to me about jaewoo and nct](http://twitter.com/peachesnjaem)
> 
> thank you for reading this questionable mush ♡♡♡♡♡♡


End file.
